When a negative comment is on someone else's page, and they have a ton of likes, and only one person comments that they really do not like it, that it is no big deal to me. My husband said a million people can like what you do and that one person that doesn't gets all of your attention. Why is that? So now that the shoe is on the other foot, I have to allow myself the opportunity to process how I feel about it, and I thought by sharing my process it might be useful to someone else?
So the question here is, how does it feel when this shoe is on my rather sensitive foot instead of yours? Can I see this issue the way I see it when it is yours? Because clearly it is no big deal! Perhaps I can see this issue as an opportunity to grow and become a more confident, self-assured person? This is my preference and I feel better already, just having written it.
The first time I just ignored their comment. I don't believe in deleting comments, because I really do like to keep it "real". The second time they posted, I can see that they want a response from me, as to how I feel about them really not liking that piece at all!
So here is how I feel: I am grateful to this person for a) having the courage to tell me how they feels, and b) giving me the opportunity to put, what I would like to think is a principle I have, into action. You see, I paint and write as an expression of what I am feeling, in the now. It may change down the road. I may look at what I have written or painted later and ask, who was that woman? After all, I have changed so much to this point already in my 52 years. What makes me think I will even agree with the way I think and how I express myself now, down the road?
So some people would say I should block the person, so they can not put negative comments on my posts in the future. But, here is the thing, it is okay for someone not to love what I do. So why would I block someone from having and expressing what ever feeling that was triggered by the work, I have posted on social media ("social" instead of "private" being the key word here)? Their response, is their immediate sense of what is true for them. I do not know what that person's experiences might have been in their life to this point, that may have triggered such a response. I feel badly that something I posted could trigger a negative feeling in someone else in the first place. But, I am not responsible for the feelings of others. Their feelings are merely sign posts pointing in the direction towards their own inner-work they could do, should they themselves choose to go in that direction at this time. My work is to express myself, where I am at in the now, in hopes of getting to know myself better. Sometimes people send me messages telling me that my work has made them feel so good, and I am truly happy about that! So when someone expresses that my work makes them feel badly, I guess I need to accept that as well. And if I have feelings of insecurity around that, I guess that is where I need to go in order to do the work I need to do right now.
I love being creative and sharing who I am becoming. If it helps you too, great! And if my work happens to trigger something in you that bothers you, perhaps that is equally beneficial? At least it has brought up some feelings, and gives you the opportunity to grow too, if you should choose to. I know I do the most growing when I am dealing with something that pisses me off. I am not an angel. I have resentments, and I have to work through them as they arise. The quality of my life depends upon this work.
Anyway, no matter whether the feedback is positive or negative, I just want to say that I respect you having the courage to be honest enough to say, "hey your work brought this up for me, and it made me feel really good, or I really do not like it and it made me feel badly." But the bottom line is that my creativity is for me. It is about me being as honest as I am able to be, in the moment, about what I am feeling.
Thanks for sharing this journey with me. I just wanted to say, I respect your journey as well, and I am truly honored that you feel comfortable enough to express your truth.